Tuesday, February 17, 2015

Just a small love note...

Feb 17,2015

Quinnywinny, Deks-Mex,

                  I just want you to know how much I love you. I am so anxious and I hate that. I want to just be in the moment with you both without worry that I'm not enough for you. I want to feel like I'm a good mom, instead of feeling the pressure constantly that if I don't teach you to potty or say please or roll over or crawl that you'll both turn out to be awful human beings. Isn't that silly? Those things just happen! You will learn those things, and I'm sorry I have never respected your timing. I haven't even when you both decided to be born late. I just want you both to know that I worry because I see your potential, and I worry because I have anxiety. It's not YOU. It's nothing you've done wrong or could do better. I love you both so much and I do take pride and awe in all that you know, and in the people I can already see in you. I only want to squeeze in the very best in all of life for you both. 



Monday, February 16, 2015

A day in our new life....

Kids: a warning to you---These pictures make our life seem wonderful, but it has not been easy. We are stressed out, unsettled, anxious, and irritable but looking at what we've done so far in Texas gives me hope that this won't turn out to be a waste of 4 years....

Mini-Updates: Deklan- you are just the WORST at potty training. I'm sorry, I blame myself because I may have rushed you, but you understand the concept. You have since you turned 2, and yet you refuse to go independently. You'd rather pee your pants, cry to us about it, then clean it up yourself- at least you have that part down. But why not just skip the mess altogether? It's a frustrating time for us, but you are adjusting. You've made a lot of new friends, you are sweet and so smart. You say funny things all the time and you can tell me your planets, geometric shapes, and name off a few coins even. You are my side kick- by my side always. You always look out for your sister, too. Wanting to feed and share with her, ALWAYS asking to hold her.

Quinn: Everyone comments on how sweet you are. I can't get out of a store without people stopping to tell me how beautiful my kids are. You are a FLIRT! You light up and smile all the time, You're easy. Rarely sick, cuddly, and fairly easy to soothe. You are almost crawling now, You babble a lot but all I understand is "Mama". You sleep in our bed- which we are growing tired of, but yet, you're my last baby so I hesitate slightly to let you go. You love food- pancakes, baby food, frozen mangoes... You laugh at your brother's humor and you like to jump and dance. I love how when I hold you, you kick your legs like you're riding a pony...lol

MWF: We've been going to stroller strides where I sing and exercise for your entertainment.
Th: we go to storytime in the library
SS: we go on trips or at least eat eggs and bacon together- that's a pretty big deal.
Daddy always comes home for lunch, and that's nice, too. After 2 hour naps (no that's not a long time) and making meals and etc... our days are spent cuddling and playing, but you're both quickly outgrowing being at home and I think you both do well in a school or daycare setting.That being said- I don't plan to ever stop cuddling you both- it'll just be at a different time, and probably with less distractions.

I hope to get a job soon so we can save money for bigger trips like to New Orleans, Houston, Ireland, and Switzerland.... Someday... and I also dream of buying that home for you to connect with and always be able to find us and call your nest.